Blessings

Because things have become so hard, Randy and Bishop Kreutz gave me a blessing last night.  As Brennon prayed (in Caden's place, because it was the 3rd Tuesday), he said, "Please bless Mom... to... do... whatever she wants."  When I thanked him for praying for me, he said he didn't really understand why I was getting a blessing, but he hoped my prayers would be answered.  Brennon was praying that Heavenly Father would bless me with what I wanted, as I did whatever I needed to do.  I'm the luckiest girl in the world to be blessed with the children I've been given.

In response to my previous post, Kimberly suggested a book all about two brains-- our "animal" brain that is all about survival, and our "human" brain that gives us power over our choices and actions (both overly simplified here, because I'm still learning).  I spent a majority of my afternoon and evening reading (after sleeping from 7:30-11:00am to make up for my previous nights' lack of sleep), finding the information extremely intriguing.  I was mistaken, I do have two brains.  I'm hoping that the skills she presents can help me process the messages between my two brains to better process this stage of my grief.  I also plan to read the book that she sites as the stepping off point for her own recovery and research into the brain.  This brings me a hope I haven't felt for many weeks.

My goodness, I miss my Caden.

Recent Books I have recently read and seriously enjoyed:

*The Year of Less-- A woman writes about her year without spending (we call this Financial Fast), and how it enhanced her life.  We love doing Financial Fasts, so it was amazing reading about someone that had successfully done it for a year (and then another).

*1-2-3 Magic-- I found this book when Caden and Keilie were small.  It helped with discipline and happiness in the home.  I've utilized it since, but have found that the kids' arguing and annoyance with each other is creeping into the home more and more, so I started reading it again.  He gives simple instructions (and scripts) to help you feel empowered to bring out the best in your kids as you shape and mold them through correct discipline.

*My Stroke of Insight-- I read this book back in like 2015.  A neuroscientist that has studied the brain for her entire career suffers a stroke and comes back from it.  My gosh, this was in interesting book.  I love learning about the brain.

 *Patchwork Reality: Happily married to a schizophrenic-- Married for 14 years before her husband had his first "dream," she tells the tale of how her husband went from the man she married to his diagnosis, and how it changed and tested everything she'd known.  Truly, the brain is an amazing organ, even when it's hard to change your own thinking.

*The Forgetting-- This novel is about a people that forget everything every 12 years.  The only way they know about themselves is through the journals they keep about themselves.  But what if they chose to change their truth to become whatever they wanted after The Forgetting?  I love the thoughts this invoked as I considered forgetting the last 12 years, and what I would do to remember our stories.

Currently reading:
*Brain over Binge-- It was in response to a book she found about recovering from addiction as you understand more about your brain that helped her overcome her bulimia.  While I find the information intriguing, it is more about the two brains that I am interested in, which will lead me to read...

Want to read:
*Rational Recovery: The new cure for substance addiction.

Sometimes I read to get lost in another reality.  Sometimes I read to understand my own a little better.  Reading is a blessing in my life.