Celebrate

My Mister got some good news today.  VERY good news.  News that I had given up hope of ever hearing, in fact.  He never lost faith.  I need to learn from his example.  He told me that when he gets home, tomorrow, we are going to celebrate his good week.  I don't need good news, anymore.  14.5 years ago, I married the man of my dreams.  I celebrate every day of my life.  It's a good day!!

Congratulations, Mister!!  Come back to me!

Honored

A few days after we arrived home from the best vacation ever, I was asked by Make A Wish to write a short testimonial about our trip.  I pondered on it for a while, knowing that there were no real words that could fully express what it meant to us.  I wrote a few paragraphs and eventually just had to press send.  Nothing seemed quite right, but I knew I could be sitting down with a million rough drafts and never feel as if it was perfect.  I felt good being able to do anything good for them.

The next day I got an email from the Vice President of the Alaska Washington chapter saying she had seen my pictures and testimonial and felt so moved by them.  I couldn't believe it!  She asked if I would be willing to allow them to use my comments in other publications within the Make A Wish foundation.  Of Course you can!!  Whatever you need!!  It felt so great to hear that the words that I didn't feel were quite perfect had made a difference to them.  It gets better...

Friday, I got an email from the Donor Relations Department of Make A Wish asking if the near-complete flyer that was attached to the email could get my seal of approval to be sent around the country.  People around the United States will see Caden's story, read my words, and hopefully feel moved enough to give generously to a foundation that gives so much to those that deserve so much more.  Children. 

Since the flyer is not finished, I'll write my testimonial and post the flyer later.


We were approached by Make-A-Wish when Caden was gravely ill.  He had just finished his first round of chemo and was feeling more sick than he ever had.  After the news that he was going to receive a wish, Caden's outlook changed simply by looking at all of the possibility that was before him.  He researched all he could online about different options for his own wish.  Not only that, he asked everyone he came in contact with about what they would do.  This was no small thing and he knew it.  I'm not sure how we would have made it through the agony that cancer was causing our family, both physically for Caden, and mentally and emotionally for us all.  It was that one wish, the endless possibility of 'What if,' that gave us the stamina to keep going just one more day.

We are forever changed by Make-A-Wish.  They gave us sunshine to think of when all we had to look at was sickness, separation, and sadness.  Words cannot express our gratitude.  The wish began as a dream-come-true that got better and better as the days progressed.  Each thing was better than the last.  So much more than we ever could have imagined.  There is no way that any other trip could even come close to the amazing one we lived.  Not only was it good for Caden, but for our other kids as well.  It wasn't only Caden's childhood that was affected by this disease, it was all of theirs.  They were counting down the days as much as he was.  They would tell everyone, including strangers, that they were going to Walt Disney World in December.  It lifted their spirits as much as it did Caden's.  The though of the wish was enough to make all of us happier.

Many tears were shed through the week, but never tears of sadness.  It is something that will never leave us, we will never forget.  We find ourselves remembering little things, laughing at times, and just enjoying the memories as much as we enjoyed the trip.  It was so much to take in, so much happiness.  In a word, it was incredible!

Chaos

I had plans to post all of the cute pictures we got from Shelby's birthday party today, but I seriously can't do anything more than breath right now.  Here's the short post until I can crack open my eyes for more than one minutes.

32 Invites
We really hoped that 16 would come
27 second-graders came to support Shelby turning 8.

It was loud.
It was crazy.
It was stressful.
It was loud.
It was a lot of running.
It was manic.

Did I say it was loud?

It was

AWESOME!!!

Good Night.  At 7:50PM.  On a Saturday night.

Snore* 

Novella

While in Seattle, a friend from Casper reached out to me.  Coincidentally, her name is Stephanie, too.  Her son, Logan, had been diagnosed, a few weeks before Caden, with Leukemia.  We have text back and forth ever since, asking how the other Stephanie's son was doing.  A friendship made stronger because of Cancer. 

I thought about her tonight, so I sent her a quick note letting her know that even though my son is done with treatment (her son has a few more years) I hadn't forgotten her.  Good news was shared about his recovery (he is in remission after a bone marrow transplant.  Yay!) as well as their upcoming family vacation.  Make A Wish is sending them to Disney World and Give Kids The World.  She said she was a bit stressed about the trip, so I sat down and wrote a novel about what she should expect.  A masterpiece, I tell you.

As I was writing everything that I could think of to ease some of the unknown, I was getting emotional again just thinking about it.  There was so much to say that would make her happy.  So much to help her forget the agony that she has watched her son endure.  The year and three months that she has been hundreds of miles away from her other kids (They live in Casper, but go to Tennessee for Cancer care) and working husband.  So many gifts given freely to her kids that have seen too much.  My fingers were flying over the keys, trying to convey the sheer blessing this trip would be for her, for her little cancer-ravaged Logan, and her family.  The hope that is given.  There is no way to prepare her for the emotions of such a trip, but I do think I am able to prepare her for the fun.  Because we did have FUN!

Randy and I saw a statistic that one in four children do not ever get their wish granted.  This made my heart ache.  The trip was a life-changer for us.  Something that gave us more than just a fun time, and fun memories.  It gave us back something that had been taken from us...our innocent childhood.  Because all of us are children at heart, and it hurts when reality becomes too hard.  It was a beautiful remembrance of what life is like through the eyes of a child.  Without thought of money, schedules, and time.  Just what fun thing will we do next?

I will never be able to express it all- no matter how many times I talk about it.  It was perfect!

My most favorite family picture we have ever had taken!

Baptism Memories

I thought this would be a good way to do her hair, since no one wants to wait for a girl to get her hair dried after the baptism. It looked ok after, but I do wish I had gone with a French braid, instead. Oh well, she looked gorgeous either way!

While waiting for another baptism to end, we quickly got a picture of all of us. I wish we would have thought to get one of all of our extended family. It was nice to have both sets of Grandparents and Uncle Ryan and Aunt Sherry. And cousin Payton was a fun surprise for Shelby. 

Brycen Powell and Shelby Dirks. 

Look at how happy she is!!!

Horrible lighting. Beautiful girl!

As I was getting everything ready for the moment she walked from the water, I was struck with such happiness for this beautiful event. Shelby was the baby that came after two heartbreaking miscarriages. Shelby's baptism came one year to the day of the most awful thing that has ever happened to any of our family. She is my beauty after the heartbreak. She is my amazing blessing. 

Green Gown

"Will everyone stop yelling?!"

My Brennon can finally hear again. The surgery went well. For him. For me- seeing him dressed it that green gown- not so much. If this had been an optional surgery I would have walked out. It took lots of prayer to keep me sane.

My son can hear again. And that is a good thing. 

Now if only I could stop this anxiety attack. It's over, Stephanie!! Get ahold of yourself!!

To The Day

January 31, 2014 

Life Flight to Seattle Children's Hospital

January 31, 2015

Shelby is baptized a Member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

One year To The Day!!

Oh, what a year it has been!

Birthday Beauty

Yesterday was Shelby's birthday. She was SO excited!!

While making her lunch, she asked if she could take some graham crackers as well as a fruit roll up. Of course the answer was yes!

"Oh, this is such a special day for me!"

I decided she needed to be taken out of school early for some shopping, crafting, and alone time. With me and with Tyson, just to be clear. When we were pulling out of the school parking lot, she said, 

"Man, I wish I could just stay at school. School is SO MUCH fun!" Um...do you want me to check you back in? To school? On your birthday? Instead of shopping?

"Well, I guess I'll go shopping" the tone she used spoke of it being for my benefit, not hers. 

Happy Birthday to my sweet, giggly Shelby. You bring joy and happiness wherever you go!

Where's the Witch?

With family coming into town this weekend, I have been trying to really deep-clean my house so I can play. More like keep it picked up after my Fire Saturday. So, when I came downstairs this morning and found Frosted Flakes all over the floor, I pretty much hit the roof. It has been a very long time since I have yelled at my kids, but I didn't sleep well, so I got ticked, quick. 

"Who.Made.This.Mess?!"

Tyson, looking totally guilty, looked up at me with big, round eyes and almost plead with me to remember, "I love you, mommy!"

And the push-over of the year was not mad any longer. I didn't clean it up for him (that would have made me push-over of the century), but I was no longer a witch. 

Wrapped, I tell you. They all have me wrapped around their little fingers. Or big, round eyes and sweet, sweet words. Whatever. 

Boys

Tyson: "I'm not going to kiss my wife!"

Brennon: "I need to save my money to buy the house next door. I always want to live next to you, mom."

With statements like these, I will always have my boys close. And never have grandkids. No kissing=no grandkids. 

Tubes

Brennon's ears have not cleared, tubes have been ordered for Monday morning. 

The other day, Brennon was sitting below me while reading his book. For just a moment, I could imagine him as a teenager, just like Caden. I could see what he would look like. Still skinny arms, just longer. Still sweet face, only older. I love my b-boy, now and forever. 

These tubes are a blessing. I'm grateful for doctors that help my kids get the most out of life. Whether it's big, like tumor removal or small, like fluid in the ears, we are blessed by their expertise. Life is good!

Smiles

 See Tyson's 'smile'?

  There are many, many, many pictures where he looks this 'happy'!

 Even with the trolls, he could barely contain his infection 'grin'.

 When I asked him why he wasn't smiling, he said, "Because I was just tired of smiling.  We had to smile every day! I just didn't want to anymore so I told myself that I wouldn't."

This wasn't even our last day!  Little did he know, I would have him smile a lot more after these beauties!!

Shelby's Baptism Photos

Baptism date:

Saturday, January 31, 2015 at 4:00PM.

Doesn't she look gorgeous?!

Pluto, please!!

Man, I love Keilie's face!!

We were just walking by the photo shoot with Pluto and got pulled in to take a picture.  Not wanting to take too much time- since we weren't even looking to take a picture, let alone butt in line- I told everyone to turn around for the picture.

 So my kids turned around the the front, while Pluto turned around to the back!  It was pretty funny!!

 And then he posed!

How fun is that?!

I think it would be so much fun to pretend to be a Disney Character.  Tyson told me later that he didn't want to take pictures with any of them.  "They just look fake!"he says.  And yet, he always asks to see the ones that he's in.  And why wouldn't he?  All of the smiles from this trip look amazing.  

We were all just so.darn.happy!!!