Break, please?!

Caden is back in the ER. Our ER here in Richland, which is better than Seattle, but still hard. Because of the Staph they found, he has been on an antibiotic that has given him the awful side effects of nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. The diarrhea has been so bad, I emailed Sue asking if I could give him some of antibiotics that stop diarrhea. When she heard how often and got a description of the stool (which is pure brown water) she said he needed to be checked for a gut infection (caused by the bacterial infection antibiotic) called C-Diff. If he has it, he'll be admitted.

We are so tired. Caden has felt awful for weeks and weeks. It hurts so much knowing that this should have been his recovery period, free of any worry but just healing, and now this. Even if he doesn't have C-Diff, he'll still spend hours at a hospital instead of spending time in the beautiful sunshine. Even if he doesn't, he'll still have 8 more days of an antibiotic that will keep him feeling exactly the same as he's been feeling for weeks and weeks. He was supposed to have a break from that before starting that chemo pill on the 7th. As it stands, he'll barely be off of the antibiotic before beginning the pill. Who knows how that will make him feel?!?!

I was venting to Danielle and Ashlee this morning, just getting my frustrations out about how much I wish he could just catch a break! Ashlee responded, "I wish we could all take turns feeling crappy for him!"

My thoughts and wishes every day of my life recently. 

Please continue prayers to Heaven for my Caden. He still needs all the help he can get. 

3:00- Negative. Huge sigh of relief!!  I feel as if I just want to sit in my room and cry. I am just done with this week. With this month. I am so tired. 8 more days of this antibiotic. Heaven help me.

12:30am- Caden's diarrhea symptoms have started to subside a little bit.  He still doesn't feel quite right, but it hasn't been as bad as it was for the last 36 hours.  He is still quite nauseous, with a lot of throwing up, so that is still quite hard. 

As I was bringing him his last dose of the antibiotic that has caused so much heartache the last few days, I almost wanted to just throw it away.  However, it is keeping the Staph from taking over his body.  It is a necessary evil- very much like the pill that he will have to take starting April 7th, and all other measures and precautions we have already taken.  And just like so many other scenarios, telling him that he needs to take it to stay healthy doesn't make it any easier for me to hand it over knowing what it is going to do to him, and it doesn't make it any easier for Caden to take it.  He knows what it's going to do to him more than I do.  I'm grateful for this Keflex prescription that is curing the infection that could kill him.  I'm grateful... but I don't have to like it.