Hopes and Dreams

Tyson has been showing some anger issues recently, some that have ended with broken or disrupted property.  The last straw came when he came to me on the Monday after the Honesty fiasco Family Home Evening, showing me that he'd kicked the wall and broke a plug face plate.  He was repentant, and listened intently as I gave him examples of what he could and could not do.  He giggled when I very seriously asked him if he'd ever seen his dad kick the wall when things weren't going his way.  It was funny to him at first, but he did recognize that Randy rarely looses his temper in ways that breaks things, and that anger should not abuse or break anything.  Randy raises his voice, like the rest of us, but he doesn't use violence in anything.

Sunday was a day of tears for Tyson.  It seemed that everything was just not going his way.  I had a migraine after church, so I spent the evening in my dark bedroom.  Tyson came in, crying about something, and just laid on me, sobbing.  I rubbed his back, played with his hair, tickled his neck, and just listened.  It finally came out that since the scan on February 17th, he's felt "real scared" that Caden is going to die.  The tears of sadness that had dried just moments before changed to tortured tears of sorrow at the thought of losing his older brother.  We talked together about how great Caden is, how he is not only the best big brother, but that he is a great son and example; He's a boy to look up to.  We talked about trying our hardest to talk more openly about our worries, so that they don't fester into fears that drag us down.  All the while, I kept rubbing his back and kissing his forehead.  After he'd cried himself out, he just laid on me, letting his breathing calm to normal.

I changed the sensitive subject to something fun-- saying names backwards.  I didn't tell him what I was doing, I just had him figure out what I was saying.  Nosyt= No Sight.  Nedac= Knee Dac.  Yblehs= EE Bless, with a huffy breath milliseconds before speaking the S.  EilieK= Ee like.   Ydnar= Eed Nar.  And, lastly Einahpets= Ee Nah Pets.  We laughed, trying to figure them out, and then worked hard for him to recite them to the family, without telling them what the words really were.  He was excited that we made up a little secret, just the two of us.  Because light is not my friend when I have a migraine, I stayed in my bed, but listened to the peals of laughter coming from just below our room.  When the fun had run out on our names game, I heard tiny footsteps coming up the stairs, my door opened and closed quickly, a dip was felt as Tyson climbed up on the bed, my weighted baby blanket covered me once more, and asked, "So, what else should we talk about?" 

With my baby giving me warmth, telling me his hopes and stories and fears, my heart felt so full.  I'd have cried, if it didn't make me want to chop my head off for the pressure.  So I contented myself with the smell of his head and the feel of his cheek as I tickled his face.  I love tender boys that want to snuggle and talk.  Turns out his anger and fears just needed to come rest with mommy- he's been more himself since.

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Tyson got home from school on Monday, asking if he could quickly work on the extra math packet that his teacher sends home as a challenge.  Since it is part of his nightly homework (although, not really turned in, just to work his mind) I told him he could do that first, if he'd like.  He finished his three pages quickly, and then excitedly pulled a book from our Homework Caddy.  Keilie had given him permission to read the Graphic Novel she'd checked out from the library.  I had read a few pages, and felt that it was ok for him, even though it was checked out from the Middle School Library, not the Elementary.  At 4:30, with everything else expected of him completed, he sat down on the front couch and started to read.

7:36- "Mom, I finished this book in one day!!"

 "No, Tyson, you finished that book in three hours!!!

I understand that it is a graphic novel, that there are more pictures than words on a page.  But this little boy read a 214 page middle school book in three hours.  By choice.  He's 7.
"Mom, can you check out the next one from the Richland library for me?"  You better believe I will!

Finally, a child that will love reading as much as I!  Knowing him, he'll surpass me in knowledge soon enough.  I know that I am horrible at grammar and sentence structure-- maybe I'll go to college to learn how to write good..... just kidding, to write well.  Wouldn't that be great, Tyson and I sitting side-by-side in a Creative Writing class, learning together.  Life Goal!  And, I can say with perfect honesty: "I would love to see my son get a better grade!"  I want him to excel in ways that only he can dream.  His mind amazes me!