Truth

We have had an incident this weekend with theft and lying.  I have been asked not to go into much detail about it on here, since these posts are printed into our blog books, but let me just say: 1- I am still incredibly angry and embarrassed about what happened.  2- When the truth finally came out a full 24-hours after we found the stolen item, revealing that I had been blaming an innocent child, I felt like the Worst Mother Ever! 3- It gave us the lesson topic for tonight's Family Home Evening: Honesty.  When the truth came out after the lesson- the one where we were emphasizing in a not-so subtle way to the wrong child- next week's lesson became quite clear: Judging.  Like I said: I feel like a HORRIBLE MOTHER!!!

Anyway, the lesson tonight included a blindfolded Brennon, an obstacle course (set up by giggly, conniving Shelby and Tyson), and a "Lying" Caden and a "Truthful" Keilie.  I put Brennon at the "starting line," telling him that he'd have to choose one to listen to, to make it to me across the room safely.  Shelby and Tyson did a countdown, with Caden and Keilie vying for Brennon's attention before the "GO" was called out.  As time went on, with Brennon following only Caden's (lying) suggestions, Keilie began getting emotional that Brennon wasn't listening to her.  After Brennon bumped into the opposite wall, thanks to Caden's lies, Keilie was almost in tears. We were able to talk about honesty from many different angles- not just about being honest, but about others wanting to trust you are being honest.  It worked out with a deeper moral than I had planned.

Parenthood is hard, sometimes.  I want to believe that each of my kids will only ever tell the truth, but I'm glad that we can use the mistakes as a teaching tool for later use.  I also hope that my kids never put me in a position like this one again.  There was good reason to think that one child was lying, but it turned out to be because of another child's lie and attempted cover up.  It felt awful to tell a child that I couldn't believe them- the evidence was very damning- and then have to whole-heartedly apologize later for ever doubting and blaming them.  It wasn't the act of apologizing that was difficult, but that there was anything to apologize for.  I wish I could take back my words of disappointment, disbelief that made a child cry themselves to sleep because their mother didn't believe their pleading innocence.  Being Judge and Jury in parenthood is not my favorite.  I wish I could fire myself-- I'm not cut out for that line of work.