No Nibbles

 For the first time since moving to Washington 8 years ago,

I have nails.  This is only the third or fourth time in my life that I've had nails.  I logically know how hideous my hands look with nails bit to bloody stubs, not to mention how disgusting I know it is to put my hands in my mouth multiple times a day like a toddler, but it's a hard 35+ year habit to break when I TRULY cannot stand the feel of nails.  I hate them so, so much.  Biting didn't take any thought (the times I've grown them out before ended because I bit some in my sleep), but I think about my nails constantly now, hating how they feel every minute.  But I love the way they look, love that my fingers don't throb every day, love that I don't have hangnails that get infected.  I'm a walking contradiction, I know.  It's also not lost on me that someone that hates nails as much as I shouldn't be blessed with nails that look as if I paid for a French manicure.  I loathe yet love these cursed beauties.

It's been almost two full months without a single nibble.  I have a goal to make it the entire year.  Wish me luck.  I would love to kick this habit for good.  I won't think about how much I hate the feel of them.  I won't, I won't, I won't!